I don’t know if I should laugh or cry???

Focus on what really matters
Get end-of-life coverage for as little as $15/month*GET A QUOTE

I can’t figure out why I keep getting these close-to-death advertisements on the Internet and in the mail. I don’t even want to go to the mailbox anymore. All I get are advertisements from funeral homes, cremation facilities, companies selling hearing aids, constipation advertising, burial grounds selling plots, companies selling wheelchairs and walkers, dental facilities selling store-bought choppers, and any other kind of item that someone close to cashing-in would be needing. Gets a little depressing knowing that Grim Reaper’s sneaky ass is waiting around the corner.
I feel so depressed I might try to crawl across Route 1 in LA during rush hour or check out to see if there is a line at the Golden Gate Bridge.

It is not the fall that killed you, it’s the sudden stop.
One thing is for sure, the son of a bitch that coined the phrase the golden years was a stone jackoff.
If any of you fools out there work for one of these on-your-way-out companies, take me off your mailing list, this shit is getting old.

Yeah – I am talking to you