Necessity is the MOTHER of invention


Connecticut man had sex with girlfriend’s corpse in hope of reviving her, police say

We have mouth to mouth, chest compressions and a few other accepted procedures that are used as life saving techniques as the old standards. Now a newly introduced method that has shocked the medical community is going to be considered by the top minds in the AMA as the NEW NORM. It is called The Aaron Gaser Method, named after the DUDE that invented it.

FOX NEWS

This Connecticut innovator was sentenced to a year in prison this week after telling authorities he had sex with his dead girlfriend’s corpse.

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Gaser said he thought having sex with the body might revive her because his girlfriend hated sleeping with him, according to an arrest warrant, the paper reported.

The report states Gaser also tied the victim’s ankles and wrists to the bedposts because it was a “fetish of his,” according to the paper.

Long before Gaser CAME on to the scene as a super star and was recognized for his ingenuity, we had Benny Franklin, Tommy Edsion and a slew of other great inventors.  I really doubt that Gaser will go down in the annals of history as they did, but he may get honorable mention for his efforts.

I mean I really; I have to give some of these wack jobs an A+ for their creativity in excuse making. Zocking his girlfriend to revive her, that has to be is on the top 10 I ever heard.

The coroners report indicated that the damsel  was deceased before Gaser was having sex with her. That type of crime against a corpse only drew the creative genius  a 1 year sentence.  I wonder how long Gaser gassed her before he realized his efforts were for naught and she was not coming back? Could have been hours. As the old saying goes; if it does not work the first time, try and try again.

If he uses his head (the one on his shoulders) while he is in the slams, he can go through all the books in the library and possibly come up with another show stopping creation!

Whatever it is, it will be interesting.

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About The Goomba Gazette

ALWAYS COMMON-SENSE Addressing topics other bloggers shy away from. All posts are original. Objective: impartial commentary on news stories, current events, nationally and internationally news told as they should be; SHOOTING STRAIGHT FROM THE HIP AND TELLING IT LIKE IT IS. Direct and to the point unbiased opinions. No topics are off limits. No party affiliations, no favorites, just a patriotic American trying to make a difference. God Bless America and Semper Fi!
This entry was posted in amazing people, bad choice, Crime, dummies, Humor, idiots, sex, The world we live in and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

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